I was surprised to learn recently that many are following our family blog. A special thanks to all of you and I hope it helps you all on your own journey for a family.
Recently, in an effort to move forward after "THE TEST" in January we had another infertility consultation we decided to move forward to try to increase our chances of having a child on our own. So in January I started a fertility drug to help me ovulate and produce more eggs. After hearing that our chances to conceive twins would raise, Jason was STOKED!!! While I said, one at a time please! So we decided to step out and JUMP in a grandiose leap of Faith and trust God and His plan and give it a try. The medicine immediately started to take affect and the side affects started rearing their ugly head, everything from mood swings (YAY!! for Jason), hot flashes, increased heavy bleeding, keeping a calendar of everything, testing to see if you are ovulating, taking prenatal vitamins, endless blood work, and just sheer exhaustion. I wake up daily counting the hours before I can crawl back in my bed and sleep. A friend said, "Maybe this is God's way of preparing you to be pregnant!" As Wonderful as getting pregnant sounds, the exhaustion just hits me like a truck so this part of slowing down has been ZERO fun for me. As exhausting as this process has been Jason and I still remain completely hopeful that we will have a child, again it may not be this way. But we are confident of God's plan for our lives. Up to this point we have kept this private and told hardly anyone, but now that we know this blog is helping others, we felt moved to share so others can just relate and not feel like they are "the only ones." Infertility is hard and many times I feel like it is a label that may define me, what I am realizing is that it does not. Many people have a hard time relating to those going through this, or simply don't know what to say. I think many do not understand that it is like a roller coaster you can't get off of!!!!!! Your body is in complete control when you are going through this. I have told Jason many times, I literally feel like a prison in my own body, trapped and at the mercy of something else. Someone told me recently they thought I was strong, yes going through this is hard and it does make you stronger , but for me it makes us more HOPEFUL and FAITHFUL to Our Savior. Faith is VERY important to us and our family, so there is a great deal of FAITH that gets us through these times. Hopefully, this blog will help others to see that infertility does NOT DEFINE YOU, it actually makes you more patient, more supportive of your spouse, and definitely draws you closer to God. In a world where every other woman seems pregnant but me, I have learned to shift my focus to others things because if I didn't do this I would be in deep depression, covers over my head,in my bed, and a basket case who was far from God. It is amazing that even after a horrible time getting blood work done, a frustrating doctor's appointment, or just taking these meds another day I feel God closer to me and our relationship more than ever.
Our Focus recently has shifted to...
Our family has been busy lately we just put a new roof on our home and beautiful shutters. I am just 3, yes 3, classes away from graduating with my Master's Degree in December, while maintaining my 4.0 average, and Jason is doing so wonderful at Church. Our church is focused on building a new building to share Christ with more people in Tallahassee. So we have MANY Blessings and are enjoying this time of "just us" and mapping out our future together, we have some major goals with God's guidance. We are prayerful that a little blessing will come our way soon and our hope this blog will continue to bless, uplift and encourage you as you go through this journey that will forever change you but NOT define you!
